Fisher
Big Mike’s Garage is back, and this time it’s personal!
Hazel
I think that was Jaws 2, not Rambo 2.
Fisher
To me this is personal! But yes I think you’re right it was Jaws. I mean though, this is a team event!
Hazel
That’s right, and this race is going to have the same rules and be worth the same amount of Season Points. To recap, the rules are as follows.
EVENT RULES
- AS ALL THINGS SHOULD BE: This is a mixed-spec race. Racers use the stats for GT4, GT5 BOP, and GT6 BOP.
- HEATED WHEELS: All racers go FLAT OUT each turn but gain no Focus. Course trajectory is laid out after the roll is made, and caution results are still observed.
- NON-ALCOHOLIC: This race is for fun and not meant to be too serious. Rules judgement and enforcement is relaxed accordingly.
- SEASONED FRIES: This event is worth Season Points, based on placement at the end of the race.
Fisher
Previously we used a list randomizer to determine start order, but we’re going to have the drivers starting positions match their previous finishing position, so for this race we’re looking at the following racers.
STARTING POSITIONS
- Pumped Up Kits – Jacob ‘Have Mercy’ Ballard in the green Aston Martin DB5 (GT-5)
- Race Ventura – Leon Wheeler in the purple Volvo P1800 (GT-4)
- Not Fast But Furious – Lauren ‘Swagger’ Quinn in the red Alfa Romeo Giulia (GT-4)
- Van Hailin’ – Jordan ‘Hammer’ Cox in the orange Mercedes 300 SL (GT-5)
- Baby Got Track – Merle ‘Mule’ Hastings in the yellow Porsche 911 (GT-6)
- Kickin Assphalt – Peter ‘Devil’ Hill in the blue Bentley Continental (GT-6)
Hazel
Wh… why are the cars flying?
Fisher
It’s not intentional, but we are filing on Christmas, so maybe it’s holiday magic! Santa’s GT Reigndeer!
Hazel
On Have Mercy! On Swagger! On Hammer! On Leon Wheeler! On Mule on Devil! ON WITH THE RACE!
TOUR DE TABLETOP – CORE TRACK 2 (ASPHALT – DRY)
Hazel
Originally we had planned to do all 8 tracks from the Core GT box as a monthly season cup, but there’s concerns about six cars on two lanes, and thus our rules oversight, Commissioner C, is reviewing the results and rules and will be setting the structure for the rest of the series.
Fisher
And moving forward, the Commissioner is going to be helping to orchestrate events more in the beginning, instead of during.
Hazel
Let’s get the overhead shot of the track!
Fisher
Three lanes this time, and a normal start. This is just an exercise, a stopgap on the way to the Golden Honor trophy!
Hazel
Do we actually have a trophy to give out?
Fisher
I’ll ask the Commissioner about that too! And with that…
But first a word from our sponsors! We’ll be back!
And we’re back, live!
Round 1
Hazel
Let’s do this! in pole position following his win in Part I, Jacob ‘Have Mercy’ Ballard in the green Aston Martin DB5 boosts to 3rd gear right out the gate, and it looks like he wobbles a bit on the end there.
Fisher
And continuing to tail him into this race is Race Ventura’s own Leon Wheeler in the purple Volvo P1800. If you recall, the GT-4 models do not have the boost die, but do have more coast dice, so what Leon is lacking in raw power he compensates with possible distance.
Hazel
It also should be said we heard the feedback about the previous races, and you don’t need to see every move, just the good ones and when the tension is high, so these are going to be a more more of highlights and less a technical review.
Fish
I couldn’t have said it better myself. Maybe just in less words so we could get to racing…
Hazel
AND ON THAT NOTE OH LOOK IT’S Not Fast But Furious’ Lauren ‘Swagger’ Quinn in the red Alfa Romeo Giulia! Lauren is the other GT-4 in this race and she overtakes Wheeler!
Fish
And Hammer joins the fight as well! Jordan ‘Hammer’ Cox in the orange Mercedes 300 SL for Van Hailin’. This is another GT-5, but he takes a different approach to boosting, and that’s trying to set himself up for a slicker move next turn!
Hazel
And bringing up the rear are both GT-6 cars, Mule and Devil!
Fisher
Fun fact, Baby Got Track’s Merle ‘Mule’ Hastings (in the yellow Porsche 911) and Kickin Assphalt’s Peter ‘Devil’ Hill (in the blue Bentley Continental) went to high school together, and played on the same football team!
Hazel
I love that we had a chance to interview drivers to get to know them a bit better!
Fish
Me too! And that’s it for Turn 1, with the whole pack tearing into Corner 1.
Round 2
Hazel
And we’re already seeing player order tossed out the window. Because this is a GT race, play goes from fastest gear to slowest, so Mule and Devil are getting a chance to make up for not getting as far last turn.
Fisher
And because we split Gear ties by distance then placement, Mule will get to try and overtake the pack, but doesn’t get far with that Speed 1 keeping him blocked.
Hazel
This is looking like quite the blockage already, which means we need that adult sooner than later.
I have reviewed the tapes and the rules and come to a decision. If there is not enough room for drivers to move to their liking, they may choose to invoke the Full Contact rules from the RX Expansion. This allows the use of team-designated Danger Tokens to push cars forward or to push past a blocked lane. Doing so however grants the rest of the racers access to the system as well.
Fisher
Just in time! It’s Devil’s turn and he isn’t afraid to turn it up a notch, engaging the Full Contact rules. He slams into Swagger in 6th Gear, pushing her and Wheeler and Mule against the inside guard rail!
Hazel
Full Contact in the briefest terms allows you to move or move past other cars, but doing so incurs pulls from the damage bag, based on compared speeds. In this case, both Mule and Swagger have to pull 2 each, and Leon and Devil have to pull three each.
Fisher
Mule gets off light with just a Danger Token.
Hazel
Swagger suffers no direct ill effect, but the crash was as loud as thunder, and now the rail is starting to fall at Tour de Tabletop. All six cars are in Asphalt Tires instead of Rain Tires, so they’ll be using the Wet side of the Dashboards until they can make a Pit Stop to change to Rain Tires.
Fisher
Wheeler does get a Gear die in damage, something that can be fixed at that same Pit Stop.
Hazel
And the Devil himself gets one Gear damage but some excellent positioning!
Fisher
Swagger is a bit banged up but ready to get the heck outta there!
Hazel
Wheeler and Hammer getting out of Dodge.
Fisher
Shaken but not stirred, Have Mercy being the only car unscathed by the Demon, the DB5 slips into the lead!
Round 3
Hazel
Leon Wheeler coasting through Corner 2 in Gear 2, just enjoying the open road.
Fisher
Swagger looks to be making this a head-to head, GT-4 showdown!
Hazel
Or is it? Hammer squares off but in 5th Gear so he’ll go first.
Fisher
Let’s see if Mule can make up for some lost time…
Hazel
Yeah, that loss oc Control is NOT going to help the Porsche catch up. Without that danger token he would have been fine though. Small favors that has a yellow sign so no more damage tokens need to be pulled.
Fisher
For now you mean! Devil has almost loses control himself, and only just barely clears Mule and the 2nd corner!
Hazel
Have Mercy takes a risk and bumps Swagger forward to take her spot.
Round 4
Hammer shoves Swagger out of the way TWICE.
Swagger brought the rain, and sent it away.
Swagger shows Hammer you can just, you know, go around.
1 gear damage
Round 5
Round 6
Round 7
Round 8
Hammer BLOWS past Wheeler to finish first!
Round 9
Using that 6th gear, Devil pushes Swagger to 3rd, and Leon to 4th.
Round 10
WINNERS CIRCLE
- Van Hailin’ – Jordan ‘Hammer’ Cox in the orange Mercedes 300 SL (GT-5) – 25 Season Points
- Not Fast But Furious – Lauren ‘Swagger’ Quinn in the red Alfa Romeo Giulia (GT-4) – 18 Season Points
- Kickin Assphalt – Peter ‘Devil’ Hill in the blue Bentley Continental (GT-6) – 15 Season Points
- Race Ventura – Leon Wheeler in the purple Volvo P1800 (GT-4) – 12 Season Points
- Pumped Up Kits – Jacob ‘Have Mercy’ Ballard in the green Aston Martin DB5 (GT-5) – 10 Season Points
- Baby Got Track – Merle ‘Mule’ Hastings in the yellow Porsche 911 (GT-6) – 8 Season Points
